Trinsic Tales:Planescapes/Chapter 03
Chapter Three: Trinsic, Party of Five
<Capn_Ascii> "As we join our heroes, we find them on their way to get ****-faced at the local tavern. Although that does bring up the point of what exactly gingerbread people drink to get smashed..."
<Capn_Ascii> You cross the square and amble on over to the nearby tavern. A sign on the front proclaims this place to be "The Sour Gumdrop". Despite the name, the building looks every bit as sugary-sweet as everything else in this town.
Leticia walks in
Sebydei tags along
<Capn_Ascii> The front door is one of those old-timey Western saloon swing doors. You pass through and can't help but raise a collective eybrow at the ambience. The place looks just like every other tavern you've ever seen - dim lighting, the smell of cheap booze, patrons ranging from the loud to the surly to the overtly drunk - yet everything is pulled off with the same Candyland motif.
<Capn_Ascii> Even the employees are in on it. There's an upright piano in one corner with a gingerbread person sitting at it playing a jaunty bar tune; a trio of unusually curvaceous gingerbread women 'wearing' barmaid outfit patterns bus tables, and there's a gruff-looking bartender with a sour frown and what looks like an eyepatch made of frosting.
<Capn_Ascii> The latter is currently polishing the graham cracker bartop with a rag, and giving you a meaningful look, as if sizing you up.
<Leticia> Leticia calmly walks up to the bar. "What've you got?"
<Capn_Ascii> The gingerbread man looks up at her with his one good eye. "We got milk, we got saspirilla, and if you're really lookin' to knock yourself out, we even got some ginger ale in the back. Aged in a peanut brittle cask for 50 years, great stuff."
<Leticia> "Uhh... milk will be fine, thanks."
<Capn_Ascii> "Pfft. Lightweights." He gives Leticia and Rayn disparaging looks as he hands them each a tall glass of cold, frosty milk. He gives Seb a somewhat more appreciative look as he hands over his drink.
<Leticia> Leticia sips her milk appreciatively.
Rayn sips as well, looking around.
Sebydei downs his sarsaparilla in a couple goes
<Capn_Ascii> As you down your drinks and look out across the bar, there's a sudden commotion from the other side of the bar.
<Capn_Ascii> "You dirty, no-good son of a confectionist!"
<Capn_Ascii> There's a crashing sound as a gingerbread man stands up and up-ends the table he and some others are sitting at. Playing cards and stacks of chocolate-chip cookies go flying. "You're cheating! I saw you hiding cards in your frosting!"
<Capn_Ascii> Another one stands up. "ME!? You're the one who keeps dealing from the bottom of the deck!"
<Capn_Ascii> "How *dare* you accuse me, you butter-head!"
<Capn_Ascii> "Oh yeah? What are you gonna do about it, pixie stick!?"
Rayn mutters "Do we intervene..?"
<Capn_Ascii> The two gingerbread men suddenly lunge at each other and begin a violent scuffle, punching and thrashing wildly as the others look on.
<Capn_Ascii> The bartender barely glances at them. "Eh, those two are fighting all the time. Just wait a few minutes, the watch will get 'em."
Rayn continues sipping milk then, watching.
<Capn_Ascii> Indeed, after a brief period of time, a pair of individuals enter the bar - a male and female elf, both wearing the official uniform of the town patrol. Which in this case, is lederhosen.
<Wulfric> "Alright, you two, that's enough," Wulfric booms out, gently reaching to grab one of the combatants.
Elspeth grabs the other.
<Elspeth> "Don't you two have better things to do?"
<Capn_Ascii> One of the gingerbread men pouts at Wulfric. "No, we don't. There's nothing to do in this town but get drunk on ginger ale and play cards."
<Capn_Ascii> The other glares at him. "Maybe if *somebody* would get up off his ass and invent TV already..."
<Wulfric> "Yes, well, you can play cards without fighting."
<Capn_Ascii> "It's not my fault he's cheating."
<Capn_Ascii> "You cheated first."
<Elspeth> "You both need to stop cheating. Or else you'll have no one to play with but each other."
<Capn_Ascii> "We only *do* play each other."
Elspeth blinks. "Well, then you deserve each other."
<Capn_Ascii> "Yeah, yeah. Fine, we'll go."
<Wulfric> "And next time, play nice."
<Wulfric> After a minute, Wulfric spots the rest of the Party. "Hey, Elspeth, look, other humanoids!"
Elspeth turns "Woah, hey! What are you doing in this neck of the woods?"
<Leticia> "We followed some insane wizard guy into a portal. You know anything about that?"
<Elspeth> "Well, I just started my shift, so I haven't heard anything." She turns. "Wulfric?"
<Wulfric> "Yeah... he was here, earlier, when you were dealing with that incident at Waffle's place... bought some stuff at the bar, but scampered when he saw me coming to ask him some questions. I mean, humanoid, obviously a planeswalker, going to see if he could help us, but... well, he went off in a cloud of smoke. Literally."
<Elspeth> "You think he was an actual planeswalker? Maybe we should track him down then.."
<Wulfric> "Yeah, could be done... if I had any idea how. Barkeep, you know anythin'?"
<Capn_Ascii> "Who, that weirdo in the robes?"
<Wulfric> "Yeah, that robed humanoid."
<Capn_Ascii> "Yeah, he was in here earlier. He wanted to buy food. Said he was going on a trip...said he was going to cross the Doughnut Plains and take the Rocky Road up to the top of Mount Cocoa."
<Leticia> "Fascinating. You got a map or something to show where this is, and/or how to get there?"
<Capn_Ascii> "Oh, sure." He reaches under the counter and hauls out a big cardboard box, labeled "Maps To Give To Adventurers".
<Rayn> "You said you needed a planeswalker? Whatever for?"
<Sebydei> "Do non-adventurers require different maps?"
<Elspeth> "Oh, we were travelling with this other planewalker. Nice guy. but then we were dropped in a peanut butter swamp a few miles away, turns out he was allergic. We haven't the coin to revive him, and no other way to get home. But we've been looking ever since."
<Capn_Ascii> He hands you one. "Just take the north gate out of town and follow the path north through the plains. The Rocky Road starts at the foot of the mountain range and winds all the way up to the peak of Mount Cocoa. There's rumors that there's some sort of tower up there, but I don't know for sure."
<Wulfric> "Yeah, and Jerrod was allergic to freaking CHOCOLATE. Sheesh, pathetic, especially for a supposed healer... and don't even get me started on what happened to poor Luxa..."
<Wulfric> "So, yeah, we were five... now we're two... sad, isn't it?"
<Sebydei> "Obviously there's a tower, if the wizard is going to be there. It's like a rule."
<Rayn> "I met a wizard in a cave once. It doesn't happen often, but it happens."
Leticia grabs the map. "I suppose we should head on out."
<Wulfric> "Uh... think you could use an extra hand or four?"
Rayn shrugs. "It's okay with me, as long as you don't get in the way. Sebydei, Leticia, what do you think?"
<Sebydei> "As long as they know what they're doing."
<Leticia> "Which begs the question... *DO* you know what you're doing?"
Elspeth smiles "If you need to ask."
<Wulfric> "Yeah. We do. Obviously. They trust us enough to keep order here, don't they?"
<Leticia> "This is a point."
Rayn nods again.
<Leticia> "Alright, let's head out. How much for the drinks, Barkeep?"
<Capn_Ascii> "4 gold. The maps are free."
<Capn_Ascii> You wonder why, until you notice that the map has a huge "THE SOUR GUMDROP" logo emblazoned on the back side.
Rayn slides a gold on the grahm cracker bar and stands.
Leticia slides a gold on the bar as well.
Leticia stands up and leads the way out.
Sebydei puts a couple gold coins on the bar and follows the others out
<Wulfric> "Very well, we shall follow," Wulfric declares, following the others.
Elspeth nods and follows Wulfric, muttering "We might finally be able to go home.. I'm so tired of wanting to eat everything in sight."
<Capn_Ascii> The bartender sighs. "Yeah, me too."
Rayn pulls the crystal she bought out of her bag as she gets outside. "It might be worth figuring out what this is before we go much further. Do you two happen to know anyone who might know anything?"
<Elspeth> "I don't. Sorry."
<Wulfric> "Neither do I. Try running back in real fast and asking the Barkeep."
Rayn nods and heads back in.
Rayn asks the barkeep "Excuse me, is there anyone in town that could help us identify a magic item? Or maybe just deals in curious items?"
<Capn_Ascii> He puts back the map box, then hauls out another box marked "Business Cards To Give To Adventurers", digs through it, and hands you a card. "There's this guy who lives as a hermit on the Doughnut Plains. Nobody sees him much, but he claims he's some sort of arcane 'engineer', whatever that means. He mostly just drops by every so often and gets so hammered we have to bounce him."
Rayn takes the card "Alright, thank you."
Rayn heads back outside "Apparently there's some guy in Doughnut Plains that can help us. I think that's on the way, right?"
<Capn_Ascii> The card has the name "Tinkerer" on it, alongside the picture of a pair of gears surrounded by a magical aura. The back has a small map with an X, presumably directing one to his house.
<Wulfric> "It is, yeah. So let's go."
Rayn nods. "Lead on."
Leticia, looking at the map, gestures at everyone to follow her, and leads on.
<Capn_Ascii> The three...er, five of you head to the town's north gate, which looks a lot like the gate you entered through. As you pass through and nod to the guards, you can see the so-called Doughnut Plains stretching out before you. They look not unlike the fudge fields you crossed earlier, except the ground here is more solid - and there are dozens of giant doughnuts standing freely among the fields, like the skeletal remains of some giganti
<Capn_Ascii> like the skeletal remains of some gigantic, long-dead...doughnut creatures.
<Elspeth> "Weird, isn't it?"
<Sebydei> "I've seen weirder."
Rayn takes to the air again and tries to see if she can see the engineer's house.
<Elspeth> "Wooaah, that's so cool. I want to be able to fly.."
Rayn takes to the air again and tries to see if she can see the engineer's house based on the map on the card.*
<Leticia> Dave gives off an arrogant screech.
<Sebydei> "I could fly...I just didn't prepare that spell today..."
<Capn_Ascii> Rayn: From your perch on high, you can easily line up the landmarks on the map to their real-life counterparts. You soon pinpoint the location in question - a small door carved (or perhaps eaten?) into the side of a building-sized doughnut about a mile off the path.
Rayn dives back down and lands on a nearby doughnut. "There's a house a mile that way." She points.
<Leticia> "Then let's go," Leticia comments, altering her path.
Rayn flies overhead.
<Sebydei> "I have to walk a whole mile? Now I really wish I prepared Fly..."
<Leticia> "Oh, stop whining and keep walking."
<Capn_Ascii> *tromp, tromp, tromp*
<Capn_Ascii> The sun is high in the sky overhead, and you find yourselves growing hot quickly in the suffocating heat. You idly wonder how all the candy and chocolate around here avoid melting.
<Capn_Ascii> Finally, after a long, parched walk, you arrive at the door. It's only waist-high; presumably, the Tinkerer is a gingerbread person too.
<Capn_Ascii> The door is simple and made of something not unlike wood, with a handle, a lock, and a small sign that reads simply "GO AWAY".
<Sebydei> "I feel welcome already!"
Wulfric wonders how well the door would survive against a hammer.
Rayn lands next to the party. "Anyone wanna try knocking?"
Rayn sighs and knocks.
<Capn_Ascii> *knock, knock, knock*
<Capn_Ascii> Nothing happens.
<Capn_Ascii> ...more nothing happens.
<Capn_Ascii> ...yet more nothing happens.
<Capn_Ascii> Then the door explodes in a massive blast of flame and debris.
<Sebydei> "At least it didn't...oh..."
<Capn_Ascii> The Party collectively leaps back and out of the way as the door spontaniously explodes into a shower of shrapnel. Well, except for Rayn, who has no time to react with her hand still on the door. She gets blown backwards, tumbling head over heels and landing flat on her back, slightly singed.
Rayn gets up and pats herself off, "Totally wasn't anticipating that." She coughs up smoke.
<Leticia> "Well, at least the door's open now."
Rayn coughs again. "It'd better be."
Leticia looks inside
Rayn pokes her head inside as well
<Sebydei> "Hold still, I've got something just for this situation..." Sebydei touches one of the gems on his belt, and then pokes Rayn
Rayn feels the burns vanish. "Thank you, Sebydei."
<Capn_Ascii> Leticia: You poke your head in through the low door - just in time to almost get it caved in with a tiny golf club. The club instead impacts on the door frame, as an angry-looking gingerbread man rants at you. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU NO-GOOD THIEF!"
<Capn_Ascii> ---END SESSION---