Trinsic Tales:Metagame/Chapter 05

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Note: This log is still in IRC format, and may be awkward to read as a result.

Chapter #5: A DM Fine Rescue

<Capn_Ascii> "As we join our heroes, HOLY CRAP RUN FOR YOUR LIIIIIVES!!"

  • Cade runs/climbs for his life.
  • Miranor does likewise
  • Jug_ applies shoes to surface with similar intent

<Capn_Ascii> Those who aren't already on the roof quickly make their way up the ladder and out into the open, as the golem begins to shove itself through the doorway shoulder-first.

<Capn_Ascii> You hear horrible grinding, twisting, and shattering sounds as the door implodes into shards of wood and glass behind you.

<Capn_Ascii> Well, you're on the roof now. The question is, now what?

<Cade> "What's the quickest way to get Capn down from this roof alive?"

<Miranor> "Just get him down the other shaft how we got up it. Anything else is probably too dangerous."

<Nenni> "There were palettes and oil drums and things on the ground beside the bottom of the ladder if that would help to have someone on them stabilising Capn as someone gives a fireman's carry down the final stretch."

<Miranor> "Seems reasonable." Miranor starts going down the ladder to provide that stability.

<Capn_Ascii> As you approach the ladder, a problem presents itself - the saftey cage. There's only room for one person at a time down most of the ladder's length - no way you're toting a body over anyone's shoulder.

  • Miranor looks for a way to simply remove the safety cage -- does it have any bolts that can be pried off?
  • Cade quickly ties his rope around Capn's shoulders and waist, then makes an upper harness out of the rope so that Capn can hang below someone as they climb down.
  • Cade holds the harness up to Jug. "You want to, or shall I?"

<Jug_> "Will do."

<Capn_Ascii> Miranor: Surprisingly enough, the designers seem to have predicted that impatient engineers might try to remove the safeguards. The cage is bolted securely to the ladder frame. You might be able to remove it...if you had a socket wrench and weren't being chased by an angry pseudo-robot.

  • Miranor sighs and just continues down. "I can catch him... I hope," he calls up.
  • Cade hooks the harness over Jug and casts Bull's Strength on him.

<Capn_Ascii> Jug: RAWR! You feel like you could TAKE ON THE WORLD! ...or at least this one specific task.

  • Cade backs down the ladder, pulling Capn gently over the edge above him, guiding his feet into the cage and making sure he doesn't bump into anything as Jug bears Capn's weight.

<Capn_Ascii> You hear an angry groan from just under the roof, as the golem tries (and fails) to climb the ladder.

<Capn_Ascii> With Jug doing the lifting, Cade guiding, and Miranor hanging out at the bottom 'supervising', you begin to bring Cap down to earth. (A feeling not wholly unfamiliar to you.)

<Capn_Ascii> Nenni does what cats always do when humans are trying to work - watches and feels superior.

<Nenni> Nenni stays at the top of the hatch, looking down at the golem's attempts to climb the ladder. If it looks like the golem stars making progress up the ladder, he plans to Grease the ladder. If the golem switches tactics, he plans to run and tell the others.

<Capn_Ascii> Nenni: The golem's efforts to climb the ladder end when it accidentally tears the ladder off of its mounting instead. It stands there holding the twisted metal in one hand, looking at it like a bewildered child. Then, it bellows angrily.

  • Jug_ follows once Capn is down and picks him up for continuing on our way.
  • Nenni continues watching, but stealthily.

<Capn_Ascii> It swipes upward with the other hand a couple of times, then stomps over toward the far wall and--

  • Miranor continues to supervise the situation

<Capn_Ascii> *WHAM!*

<Capn_Ascii> Whoa. You felt that clear out on the ladder. The golem hammers at the wall with its fists, trying to carve the most direct intercept path it can think of.

<Capn_Ascii> Eventually you manages to get Cap down to ground level, where Miranor begins untieing him.

<Miranor> "Get the car started! Let's get out of here!"

  • Cade runs to the Van Of Awesome and starts it.

<Capn_Ascii> The golem punches the wall a second time, a third. A shower of masonry explodes outward as it steps through the opening it's just created...

  • Nenni runs for the team.

<Capn_Ascii> ...and promptly falls like a lead balloon, impacting the ground below with an earth-shaking *THUD*.

<Capn_Ascii> It bellyflops directly onto its face, having made no attempt whatsoever to execute a proper landing. That doesn't stop it from slowly starting to climb to its feet, though.

<Capn_Ascii> Cade: The van is all the way back out at the street! You huff and puff and run as fast as your short legs will carry you.

  • Miranor helps Jug carry Capn out towards the van.

<Capn_Ascii> You hobble away with Cap's body as the golem rights itself and begins stomping after you meneacingly.

<Capn_Ascii> Dundundun, dun dun. Dundundun, dun dun.

<Jug_> "So how do we get the golem off our trail?"

<Capn_Ascii> Cade: You hop into the van, crank it up, and burn rubber up the driveway towards the factory to close the gap between you and the others. Soon they're opening the back doors and shoving Cap into the back like a pair of professional mafia hitmen.

<Cade> "Get...get so...far away...he can't...see where ... we went." Cade puffs out to Jug.

<Nenni> "Tune the radio to Heavy Metal!" Nenni suggests helpfully.

<Jug_> "Must go faster!" Jug looks into the mirror, reading 'Objects in Mirror are Closer than they Appear'.

  • Miranor gets in the van, slams the door. "Gogogo! Out of here! Not towards anywhere in particular!"
  • Cade peels away, to the scent of burning rubber.

<Capn_Ascii> Jug: In the mirror you can see that...the golem is running!? It's a slow, loping run, but a run nontheless. Fortunately, it still can't keep up with a moving vehicle, and soon you're peeling down the driveway and roaring away from the building, leaving it behind.

<Miranor> "I recommend we take a circuitous path to base."

  • Cade makes a lot of random turns, hoping the golem doesn't have any "special" way to track them out of sight.

<Capn_Ascii> You take a winding path back to the base, hoping the creature won't have the intelligence to follow you. Soon you're pulling up behind the laundromat, safe and sound.

<Nenni> "It will probably mindlessly continue to follow the last order it was given while it was within range of the Archmage. If it gets out of range, it will just continue. Losing it is our best bet."

  • Cade parks and looks back at the others. "So how do we get this cap off Cap?"

<Nenni> "Maybe the gnomes in the workshop can feed the cap into their recycler machine and recoup whatever magical essence is in it? We don't want that -they can have it for free- but it will consume (or at least damage / disable) the cap."

<Miranor> "I agree. Worth a try."

  • Cade shrugs. "Sure."
  • Cade recovers his twice-useful rope and starts helping Jug lug Cap into the base.
  • Nenni goes and opens the loading bay doors with the Big Red Button.

<Capn_Ascii> You drag your DM into the building, dump him down the ladder into the basement, and drag him inside. Gizmo the Gnome is already walking out to meet you as you enter.

<Capn_Ascii> "What the *heck* is going on? Our instruments are picking up massive amounts of...oh." He takes one look at Cap and goes wide-eyed. "Crap! Quick, this way!"

  • Miranor nods and helps drag Cap 'this way'

<Capn_Ascii> He leads you over to a section of the back wall of the base, where you notice a metal door that wasn't there before. He opens it and leads you all into a small room, about the size of a jail cell, that's lined entirely with metal. "Put him in here."

  • Miranor gently does so

<Capn_Ascii> You prop Cap up against the wall, leaving him to sit there, drooling slightly. Gizmo then leads you back out and shuts the door.

<Capn_Ascii> "Okay, whew. That was a close one."

<Cade> "What exactly was it close TO? What is that cap?"

<Nenni> "Your instruments were picking up masses amounts of what? Did you just turn him into a power station?"

<Miranor> "Yeah, I was worried that he might cause us problems."

<Miranor> "And I hope we can fix him soon."

<Capn_Ascii> "Not exactly. Okay, look, it's like this..."

<Capn_Ascii> "You guys said that your friend here has some sort of incredible power to control the world around us. The Archmage wants to use that power, so he nabbed your friend and slapped that helmet on him. It's basically a conduit that's feeding power to the Archmage."

<Capn_Ascii> "While you guys were gone, we finished that signal blocking material you asked for and used it to line this room. As long as he's in there, the Archmage can't find him and can't pull any more power from him."

<Capn_Ascii> "But I don't know how to get that helmet off of him. Not without pulling his head off, anyway."

<Jug_> "There's these people that know how to remove scalps..."

<Nenni> "Scalpels? Scalpers?"

<Jug_> "I don't remember... it's something I just heard once."

<Capn_Ascii> "It's magically wired into his brain. It's not coming off unless you turn it off, and only the Archmage knows how to do that."

<Nenni> "So why is it making him so la la?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Oh, that? That's what the cap does. It's sucking on his brainwaves like a leech and broadcasting them to its master. His thoughts are all scrambled up."

<Capn_Ascii> You hear a "Pwaaaaf" from beyond the door as Cap tries (and fails) to contritube to the conversation.

<Nenni> "So while he's in the cell and his universe-controlling powers are no longer being siphoned off, is he more in command of his faculties? Doesn't... sound like it..."

<Capn_Ascii> "Nah, you're not getting his mind back until that cap comes off."

<Capn_Ascii> "It's like trying to bail out a boat while there's still a leak in it. Gotta close the hole first."

<Miranor> "Which it sounds like we can only do by getting the Archmage to turn it off?"

<Miranor> "Guess we need to go ahead and go for those pages, then."

<Capn_Ascii> "That, or find whatever he's using and turn it off yourselves."

<Cade> "Yeah, pages," Cade says, a little glumly at the lack of an instacure.

<Miranor> "But he'd probably just turn it back on again. Unless... is there a way we can signal you to take it off, if we turn it off, before it can be turned back on?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Don't worry, it'll be really obvious if he comes out of it. We'll keep an eye on him and get to work the moment we have an opportunity."

<Nenni> "Could you set to work building a replica mind-control energy-draining cap? We can fit it to the Archmage when we catch up with him (now that he's deprived of Capn's universal power) and create a feedback loop that will give him a taste of his own medicine."

<Miranor> Miranor looks at Nenni. "Let's not."

<Nenni> "Don't you like putting ants under magnifying glasses and watching them squirm? Oh. You're not a cat."

<Cade> "Unless it's the only way to restore the world to how it should be," Cade notes.

<Miranor> "I'm not exactly convinced that this merger, in the long run, is bad. What's bad is this obviously evil archmage running around."

<Nenni> "Even if he is impotent now."

<Capn_Ascii> "The cap is custom-built. It won't work on anyone other than your friend."

<Capn_Ascii> "He's the only one with this reality-warping power, after all."

<Nenni> "Good to know - so magic and psionics don't count. Alright."

<Jug_> "Oh, he's always been warped."

<Miranor> "Indeed."

<Capn_Ascii> "Perhaps, but now his mind is warping everything else around us too. I stuck my head outside earlier out of curiosity, and saw wagons moving without horses!"

<Nenni> "Horses?"

<Miranor> "No, that we expected. It's more complicated than you think... I'm not really sure how to explain this, but in short, it's actually two worlds merging... we should probably stop it, in theory, but again, I'm not convinced about that."

<Capn_Ascii> "Well, whatever you do, do it soon. Things can't hold together very long like this. We've got a few days, tops, before things start to implode."

<Miranor> "Implode? Implode how?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Y'know. Like...*shlrrrrPOP*" He proceeds to make gestures with his hands of two masses twisting into each other and then disappearing in a puff of logic. "The universe needs to be one way, or the other way. Right now it's two ways. If this keeps up, it'll be zero ways."

<Miranor> "That doesn't really explain why, though."

<Capn_Ascii> "Don't ask me, I slept through Advanced Planar Physics. All I know is that two dimensions trying to coexist in one space at the same time is like two fat guys trying to cram into one phone booth. Keep it up, and there won't be any phone booth left to cram into."

<Miranor> "Great. So we have to fix the universes... somehow."

  • Miranor sighs. "Alright, we need those sheets. Let's pick one and go hunting. Where are they again?"
  • Cade pulls out the map.

<Capn_Ascii> According to the map, you've got five places to check - the mall, the library, the convention center, a bar, and one more place whose icon isn't immediately recognizable.

  • Miranor checks the time of day

<Miranor> "We should probably hit the mall before it closes."

<Nenni> "There could be equipment amongst all the stuff in this den that'll help us access it if we arrive /after/ it closes, too."

<Jug_> "Just remember that we'll have to deal with mall security if we wait until after it closes."

<Miranor> "Yes, but I'd prefer not to engage in that. Last thing we need is to evade the police as well."

  • Cade nods and heads back out to the van.
  • Miranor follows. "Let's do this."
  • Jug_ plays the Following the Party song.

<Cade> Once everyone is in the van, Cade heads for the mall.

<Capn_Ascii> ---END SESSION---