Trinsic Tales:Metagame/Chapter 01

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Note: This log is still in IRC format, and may be awkward to read as a result.

Chapter #1: Getting Into Character

<Capn_Ascii> "Alright, who's ready to RP!?"

<Capn_Ascii> Cap'n sits at his place of honor opposite the table, safely ensconced behind his DM screen. He sounds excited, but there's an edge to his voice like that of an Orc who's about to slaughter a bunch of defenseless villagers and enjoy every second of it.

<Capn_Ascii> (So basically, his usual Dungeon Master attitude.)

  • Miranor fiddles with the pile of d10s. "Okay, yeah, let's start."
  • Nenni is curled up on a pile of books he hopes someone will need, and therefore have to pat him to access.

<Sheona> "I just hope we don't get TPK'd this time. Or explode."

<Capn_Ascii> "I make no promises."

<Miranor> "Could be worse. Could be a Star Wars game. That's just a fast way to die."

<Capn_Ascii> "Okay, I guess everyone's ready. And by 'everyone', apparantly I also mean the cat." Cap'n glares across the table at the cat. "This is the last time I let someone talk me into letting them fill out a character sheet for their pet just to fill out the party."

<Cadellin> "Knowing your campaigns, we're going to need all the help we can get."

<Miranor> "Cats are evil."

<Capn_Ascii> Everyone is seated at the table, character sheets in front of them alongside various other similar papers. They're all written on custom stationary that makes them look like old pieces of parchment. Various LARP props are scattered about the den as well.

<Miranor> "Why am I doing this, anyway?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Doing what? Playing?"

<Miranor> "With a cat," Nick comments, looking nervously at the cat.

  • Nenni yawns appreciatively.

<Cadellin> "Why NOT play with a cat?" Anna says, petting the cat.

<Sheona> "I like cats! Some of the time, at least," Evelyn says and shrugs

  • Nenni purrs approvingly :-)

<Miranor> "Because I'm probably going to sneeze uncontrollably soon."

<Capn_Ascii> "Please turn your head if you do. This paper was pricey."

<Miranor> "Right."

  • Cadellin digs around in her purse and fails to find any antihistamines for Nick.

<BLusk> "Eh, cats love to rub against people who are allergic. They know they're TRUE cat people, right?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Alright, if everyone's ready..." Cap'n stands up and begins to speak dramatically. "As we join our adventurers, we find them having been captured by the evil Archmage! They find themselves trapped in an underground prison, locked in a cell, as the wizard goes about creating his army of monsters and abominations to run roughshod over the land. Can they escape and thwart his eeeeevil plan?" He makes wriggly gestures

<Capn_Ascii> with his fingers and tries (and fails) to put on a convincing bad guy face. "Muahaha!"

<BLusk> "Locked in a cell? Is this like the time you made us start with nothing but loincloths?"

<Cadellin> "Does the Archmage have a name? Or a species?"

<Capn_Ascii> "No, you're all dressed this time. Thank god."

<Miranor> "I search the cell."

<Capn_Ascii> "Oh, you have all your gear as well. He's evil, but he's not too bright."

<Sheona> "Do I have my animal companions?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Yes, he does, but you didn't ask him so he didn't bother to tell you. He's human, you think."

<Miranor> "Wait, is he still there?"

<Cadellin> "If he's not too bright, how did he capture us in the first place? Are you implying WE'RE not bright?"

<Capn_Ascii> "Sheona, a quick look around reveals they're not in the cell with you. There's another cell across the hallway, and you can see them locked up in there, each one inside a small cage. They look at you and whimper."

<Capn_Ascii> "What? No, he left."

<Capn_Ascii> "Hey Cade, you said it, not me."

<Miranor> "Okay, I search the cell... roll search?"

<Sheona> "We gotta rescue my kitties! Oh, and escape, ourselves."

<Capn_Ascii> "Miranor, give me a Search check."

<Capn_Ascii> Cap'n hands you a d20.

<Miranor> "31 total"

<Capn_Ascii> You roll the dice. Eighteen! Plus thirteen, that makes...

<Capn_Ascii> Miranor: You search the cell. Aside from yourselves, the only occupant is a skeleton that's sitting in one corner, shackled to the wall by a chain around his ankle. He's wearing the ancient, tattered remains of an adventurer's outfit, and...wait, what?

<Capn_Ascii> You blink once, then again, as if trying to clear your vision. One moment you're sitting at the table counting numbers, the next you're in a dank prison cell with a bunch of other people of various species and professions. What the hell!? Everyone else seems as surprised as you, at least...

<Miranor> "Wait... what the **** just happened?!"

<Sheona> "Uh...am I having an episode? Can you all see this?"

<Miranor> "If you're in a prison cell, yeah, we can see this."

<Sheona> "Okay, good...wait, we're in a prison cell?!"

<Sheona> "How are we gonna get out?!"

  • Miranor looks around, then at himself. "I'm... armed. Wait..." he thinks back to his sheet. "Uh... my gear matches what I had written down. Uhhhh... yeah. That's... huh."

<Cadellin> "Guys, I think there's something wrong with my glasses."

<Cadellin> "Did someone set up an image projector? Look around for cameras or something."

<Miranor> Miranor digs into a pouch on his belt... yep, his thieves' tools are right there! He grabs them and tries to work on the cell lock, not really knowing what he's doing at first.

<Miranor> "First things first, get past this door."

  • Cadellin knocks on the stone of the cell walls. "Huh. Feels real. How did they DO this?"

<Nenni> The hackles on the back of Nenni's neck rise and he feels less comfortable and more cold. Is he in a cage all by himself or in a cage with all the people in the cell across the corridor? He shakes himself to clear his vision.

  • Cadellin suddenly notices ... differences ... in the sensations coming through her body. Some of them suggesting, in fact, that she is no longer a she.

<Cadellin> "Uhh... guys, I feel REALLY strange."

<Miranor> Miranor takes another look at Cadellin. "Hmmm... yeah, that would be, wouldn't it?"

<Nenni> "Tell me about it!" Nenni says, surprising himself with the ability to speak in a way those around him understand.

<Sheona> "I feel different, too."

<Cadellin> "Did...did the cat just talk?"

<BLusk> "Who slipped me some LSD?"

<Miranor> Miranor glazes over slightly. "Dude... a talking CAT!"

<Nenni> "I've always liked listening to you guys' stories, but this one... it really draws me in, you know?"

<Cadellin> "Is... is the GM here? Maybe he got turned into the cat?"

<Capn_Ascii> You notice that Cap'n is nowhere to be seen.

  • Cadellin tries stomping around in all the heavy armor she's, err he's wearing, and finds it surprisingly bearable.

<Capn_Ascii> Miranor: To your great surprise, your hands seem to know what they're doing even if you don't. You're so distracted talking to the others that when you turn back to the lock, you find the door hanging open.

<Nenni> Nenni starts cleaning his coat of all the nasty dungeon-y stuff that has somehow got on it.

<Cadellin> "I've always wondered what it would be like to be particularly short," Cade says, looking up at everyone. "I'm not sure I like it."

  • Miranor carefully looks outside.
  • Sheona looks down at herself. "Huh. No more estrogen pills, I guess?"

<Cadellin> "Huh. Maybe I should take them. But... we probably have bigger issues to deal with right now."

<Capn_Ascii> Miranor: The corridor outside the cell dead-ends at the right-hand wall of the cell, but continues off to the left. The cell across from yours has Sheona's critters locked up inside of it. They look sad. :(

  • Miranor gets to work on opening up the critter cell

<Capn_Ascii> Miranor: You try picking a lock again, hoping that whatever guided your hands before still works. This time, though, something seems off. At first it's just a vague sensation of something not being quite right, but about the time you poke yourself in the eye with your lockpick you're fairly certain you've screwed something up.

<Miranor> "Ow!"

<Miranor> "Let's try this again," Miranor takes a deep breath before continuing.

<Capn_Ascii> Miranor: You focus a bit, and soon find yourself guiding your hands with surprising skill. It's like driving a car - the motions are almost automatic, as long as you don't think about them too hard.

<Capn_Ascii> The lock clicks open. The critters look up from inside their cages, their expressions hopeful.

<Nenni> "Let's try to not make *too* much noise here... we might be unwelcome to be seen roaming about." Nenni has met unwelcomes in the past.

<Cadellin> "The Talking Cat is telling us to be quiet. Cuz this isn't crazy AT ALL."

  • Miranor checks the cages for a lock

<Capn_Ascii> The cages are closed with padlock clasps, but there are no actual locks - someone's just driven a pair of old metal spikes through the hoops to keep the doors shut. Opening them should be easy.

  • Miranor does so

<Capn_Ascii> The spikes pull out easily enough, and the cage doors open. The beasties inside immediately jump out and begin crowding around Sheona happily.

  • Sheona pets her two bobcats. "So these are definitely mine."
  • Nenni goes to check out the skeleton chained in the corner.
  • Cadellin looks down the hallway to the left, wondering if there are more prisoners.
  • Miranor looks down the hallway as well
  • Nenni paws its Ancient Adventurer's Outfit to see if anything jangles in its pockets.

<Capn_Ascii> The corridor leads a fair distance off in that direction. You can see multiple cells on both sides. It looks like you're at the end of a decently-sized cell block. You do notice the place is eerily quiet, however.

<Capn_Ascii> Nenni: You hear a sweet jingling from the skeleton's pocket. Keys? A catnip bell toy!?

<Capn_Ascii> You rip the pocket open with your claws, and...oh. It's just a bunch of those shiny coins the humans like.

<BLusk> "Watch out, you never know when a pocket might be trapped... oh."

  • Cadellin sighs at the long corridor and begins tramping resolutely down it.

<Nenni> Nenni remembers who was patting him earlier. "Cadellin, I found coins for you!"

<Nenni> *shineys

  • Cadellin quickly turns back around and returns to the skeleton, taking the coins from the pocket.

<Cadellin> "Thanks, talking cat!"

<Capn_Ascii> Yoink.

  • Nenni purrs and accompanies Cadellin down the corridor.
  • Miranor follows Cadellin

<Capn_Ascii> The Party heads off down the cell block hallway. You're relieved to see that the other cells all seem to be empty, save for the occasional skeleton or pile of moldy straw. You pass by a half-dozen or so cells on each side before you reach a heavy iron door hanging open on its hinges. Beyond it is a staircase leading upward.

<Miranor> "Shall we go up?"

<Capn_Ascii> Cade: You can sense that you're about 20 feet underground.

  • Miranor starts heading up the stairs.
  • Nenni does too.

<Cadellin> "Well, at least there's not TOO many flights of stairs to go up."

  • Sheona tags along

<Cadellin> "Unless we have to climb more floors," he adds darkly.

<Nenni> "I'm quite happy to go up a level, or two, if it means we get to go outside."

<Capn_Ascii> The stairs go upwards a couple of floors, doubling back on themselves along the way. At the top is a fairly ordinary looking generic door, painted that awful generic blue-green that so many businesses use for their generic doors. Ugh. You can hear a rather pronounced rushing sound from beyond it, like that of running water or howling wind.

  • Miranor carefully opens the door

<Capn_Ascii> The door looks like something you'd see in an everyday office building, not a prison. Hmm.

<Capn_Ascii> You open the door, step through, and...uh.

<Capn_Ascii> The scene beyond is pure chaos. It's the back room of the hobby store - the den you were just playing D&D in before this all happened. Or, rather, what's *left* of it.

<Nenni> "This smells like home... but something wrong here."

<Miranor> "...what happened here?"

  • Cadellin quickly checks his/herself to see if being in the "real" world means going back to being a human female, but ... apparently not.

<Capn_Ascii> The entire ceiling of the room (and indeed, the whole building) has been literally ripped off, presumably by the tornado that's now whirling around overhead. The sound of howling wind is deafening, and you can see chunks of building and various random street objects (a mailbox, a bicycle, a cow) being slung around in a circular pattern over your heads. Hobering up there in the center of the cone is a human figure - hooded, dressed in rune-covered robes that billow in the wind. The upper half of his face is hidden beneath the hood, but you can see enough of his chin to note an evil grin. His arms are upraised as if in the middle of a spell.

<Miranor> "You know... we should probably stop that guy... but I don't know how we're going to do that from here."

<BLusk> "I didn't know we were expecting a Dorothy moment!"

<Capn_Ascii> Floating in front of him is Cap'n, who is hanging in mid-air with an awkward pose that reminds you of a marionette dangling limply from a string. His eyes are glowing, and his face has a blank look on it. Spinning around him in a circle are several sheets of parchment, which only barely seem to be holding orbit around him without being torn away by the tornado.

<Capn_Ascii> The hooded figure - presumably the Archmage - speaks. "Muahaha! Finally, my plan has come to fruition! Thank you, foolish human!" He's speaking to Cap'n, though the latter doesn't respond. "Now that I have access to your world, I shall build my army and conquer it forthwith!" ...forthwith? Really? "And now...AWAY!"

<Capn_Ascii> He claps his hands together, and with a brilliant flash of magic and a thunderous *BOOM*, everything vanishes. The tornado, the Archmage, Cap'n, the parchments, the works. The roof is still missing, though you can see clear sky beyond it.

<Capn_Ascii> Moments later, a mailbox lands on the game table in the middle of the room, smashing it.

<Capn_Ascii> Everything is quiet. Somewhere off in the distance, you hear a cow mooing.

<Nenni> "Looks like we got here just in time to catch a glimpse of our dramatic storyteller. I've never seen him get so carried away before!"

  • Cadellin , stunned, focuses on irrelevancies. "Is...is that a cow? How did a cow get into town?"

<Sheona> "I'd be more worried about that conquering stuff."

<Miranor> "Well, this sucks," Miranor sighs, then with eternal practicality, makes for the mailbox and checks inside for mail.

<Nenni> "Someone should probably check the mail first. Might be important."

<Sheona> "I'd also be worried about that use of 'forthwith'."

<Cadellin> "Next time...regular paper for the character sheets."

<Miranor> "Quite," Miranor agrees.

<Capn_Ascii> The mailbox - the big one, the sort you'd see on a street corner - is both badly dented and infuriatingly locked. You could open it, but tampering with the mail is a federal offense!

<Capn_Ascii> You do notice something pinned between the box and the table, however.

  • Miranor checks the pinned thing

<Capn_Ascii> It's a large sheet of parchment that appears to be a map. At first glance it looks like some cheap rough draft that Cap'n would have scribbled for the game, but as you stare at it the lines begin to shift and flow...

<Capn_Ascii> ---END SESSION---